Monday, December 19, 2011

Shit Girls Say and Cinderella Ate My Daughter

Okay, *I KNOW* that my video sharing has gone THROUGH THE ROOF... But, I can't help it!  Lately, there has been too much hilarious(ness?) online... and I HAVE TO (or so says the little voice in my head) share it with you guys!

Episode 2 of "Shit Girls Say" was uploaded.... and yes, I'm totally guilty of this and each time I watch it, I laugh a little bit harder!  You're welcome.
"Is that coffee?  I might get one."

On another girly note... 

Let's talk books.  In particular:
The synopsis reads:
"Pink and pretty or predatory and hardened, sexualized girlhood influences our daughters from infancy onward, telling them how a girl looks matters more than who she is.....  Does playing Cinderella shield girls from early sexualization- or prime them for it?  Could today's little princess becomes tomorrow's sexting teen?  And what if she does?  Would that make her in charge of her sexuality- or an unwitting captive to it?"
Being a mother to a 4 year old girl, this book instantly grabbed my attention as a must read.  I have to confess, I always wanted a little boy.  The thought of raising a mini-me, with all the hormones, insecurities, etc. seemed a daunting task in the least.  Raising a boy, on the other hand, seemed a much simpler task to endure.  When I found out I was in fact carrying a little girl, I cried.  I was instantly scared shitless.  After I got over my fear, and came to terms with having a little girl- I made the NO PINK rule.  I was having a little girl, but I would be damned if I was going to have bubblegum pink all over the house!

I registered for greens, yellows and blues.  Her nursery with jungle theme, in "boys" colors.  I bought nothing pink from her.  Everything pink came from people who did not respect my hormones wishes.

Then, boom!  A beautiful, healthy, blue eyed, baby girl was born.  And, I was in love.  Couldn't have pictured it any other way.  A daughter was my destiny.  I eventually began to embrace pink.  She looked so "cute" in it!  It really was a good color on her, with her fair skin and light features...

Around 3, she began to become very invested in the clothing she wore.  All she picked out was pink. All she wanted to wear were dresses, skirts and tights.  Suddenly, she became obsessed with dolls, playing house, cooking with play food, DISNEY PRINCESSES.  And, I got scared... I wanted to make her happy... But, I was afraid somewhere along the way I failed her.  I taught her gender roles and now she was never going to be my super cool hipster child.

Peggy Orenstein made me realize that as her mother, I still have the power to teach her that loving pink and being a strong woman can happen.  That just because she loves Sleeping Beauty does not mean that she believes that a man is going to be her saving grace.  It is up to me to teach her to value herself.  If I do not embrace the things that she likes, she may end up rebelling against me, or feeling ashamed for liking something that is "wrong."

Orenstein is a vivid writer, with a strong narrative and she brings up some incredibly interesting points.  I would definitely recommend this book to ALL PARENTS.  It's a quick read and will keep your attention.  It's very well written, can be serious while also providing laughs.



7 comments:

  1. Hmm...interesting synopsis. It reminds me of Reviving Ophelia, which I recommend you read (especially as the mother to a little girl).

    Man, they try to pimp out those disney princesses before the kids are even born. Apparently some hospitals give out free disney onesies. It's bonkers.

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  2. I think I might be slightly guilty of that girl stuff says stuff. :-p

    I read an exerpt from the book you mentioned, and it was really good! I'll have to get it someday.

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  3. Damn all these videos! I can't watch them at work. I'll have to email it to myself for viewing from home.

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  4. I want to check that book out, for sure. My kids are older but I still have issues when it comes to embracing 'girl culture' while still navigating the problematic aspects.

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  5. I had a "no dolls" rule--I didn't want her to think she could only play with "girl stuff," and still whenever anyone asks what she wants as a gift I give them educational toy ideas...puzzles, art things, books...but, kind of like you, I've realized that the world is not going to end if she wears pink or plays with dolls, that she can do that AND everything else. Just as I don't want her to think she can only play with dolls, I don't want her to think she can't--I want her to have self-confidence and -esteem and make her own choices. And she does. And most of the time she chooses dolls haha.

    I did want a girl though, because I think I'd be more nervous if I had a boy--they're likely to do much more dangerous shit...

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  6. just watched the video and omigod i am SO guilty. jason will crack up when i show this to him. ice cream DOES make me cough!

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  7. I'm terrified of ever having a daughter. The knee-jerk reaction would be to keep her locked up until she's 50.

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