It happened suddenly on Monday night. We were leaving the mall, headed for my favorite restaurant (mmm... authentic Mexican!) and the nausea hit me like a sledge hammer. I tried to keep myself composed, swallowing the constant flow of saliva. As soon as we sat in a booth, I ran to the bathroom and all the green tea I drank at Barnes and Noble earlier came up. But, then, I felt fine. (The trick of getting sick! Right after you do, you feel fine... Bogus!) So, I reassured Garrett and Eva I was good to go. Eva had to use the bathroom a little later. I took her so that she didn't have to use the men's. I lost my marbles again. Poor girl ran out of the bathroom.
We left shortly after that.
And, then I spent all Tuesday laying on the couch keeping nothing down.
I'll even tell you something super embarrassing.
I was dry heaving so bad that I tinkled in my pants. :(
Definitely a low point in my life.
BUT! Onto my New Years Resolutions (that I was supposed to deliver MONDAY! Thanks flu, you asshole.)
1. Never Pee My Pants Again (this was a new edition.)
2. Stop Cursing So Much. I say "fuck" waaaaaaaaaay too much. Not usually in front of the child, luckily. But, I really need to work on my sailor mouth. Not classy.
3. Make More Time For Art. The last year or so, I haven't spent enough time nurturing my creative nature. I love to paint and create things. My good friend Katie got me a stack of canvases for Christmas, and told me I needed to get my ass back on the creative train. (Shit, I just I said "ass." Whoops, I just said "shit." I AM GOING TO STRUGGLE WITH THIS ONE!)
4. Stop Holding Grudges. I admit it, it's true. An elephant never forgets. I remember everything. Sometimes, it's beneficial... other times, it's a bit of a curse. I need to start letting things go. I've already started putting this into effect... For those of you that follow my blog, I have griped about an old friend from time to time on here. I've given her another chance to be in my life. Also, I have been corresponding with my Mom here and then via text messaging. Baby steps.
5. Finish A Story That I'm Proud To Share With Other People. I write A LOT. But, I rarely, if ever, share anything I write with anyone else. I want to use my creative energies to write something I'm very proud of, and not afraid to share. How am I going to make a living off of writing if I'm so afraid of being rejected? Which brings me to my next resolution...
6. Stop Being Afraid Of Rejection. Because, really... does it matter? What doesn't kill you, only makes you stronger.
7. Take Further Steps At Living A Greener Life Style. It's not always easy to "live" green when you are poor. Sometimes, you just have to take what you can get. But, I am going to make a conscience effort to do even better.
8. Get Organized. I am a scatter brain, and you can see it in my bedroom more than anywhere else. Time to train myself. I know it will reduce my stress levels ten fold if I can get this one under control.
9. Breathe. I do not do this enough. Anyone that is close to me know that I'm usually having a panic attack, pretending I'm not having a panic attack, or distracting you from the fact that I'm panicking by making jokes. I'd like to just breathe and avoid the panicking all together.
10. Be Happy And Take One Day At A Time. I know my emo-nature can be charming sometimes, but I'd like to boot that depressive little part of me for good this year. (I do write better when I'm sad... But, then again... maybe my writing is so sad and that's why I never want to share it with anyone. And, until I conquer this, how can I conquer Resolution Number 5? The circle of life my friends.) There is so much beauty and happiness in this world. I have to stop letting the dark overtake the light.
2012 is going to be a CRAZY year! We are having another BABY for crying out loud! Eva has been the only one for 4 years... and in July, she will have a little brother or sister to show the ways of the world too... Life is definitely changing!
We left shortly after that.
And, then I spent all Tuesday laying on the couch keeping nothing down.
I'll even tell you something super embarrassing.
I was dry heaving so bad that I tinkled in my pants. :(
Definitely a low point in my life.
BUT! Onto my New Years Resolutions (that I was supposed to deliver MONDAY! Thanks flu, you asshole.)
1. Never Pee My Pants Again (this was a new edition.)
2. Stop Cursing So Much. I say "fuck" waaaaaaaaaay too much. Not usually in front of the child, luckily. But, I really need to work on my sailor mouth. Not classy.
3. Make More Time For Art. The last year or so, I haven't spent enough time nurturing my creative nature. I love to paint and create things. My good friend Katie got me a stack of canvases for Christmas, and told me I needed to get my ass back on the creative train. (Shit, I just I said "ass." Whoops, I just said "shit." I AM GOING TO STRUGGLE WITH THIS ONE!)
4. Stop Holding Grudges. I admit it, it's true. An elephant never forgets. I remember everything. Sometimes, it's beneficial... other times, it's a bit of a curse. I need to start letting things go. I've already started putting this into effect... For those of you that follow my blog, I have griped about an old friend from time to time on here. I've given her another chance to be in my life. Also, I have been corresponding with my Mom here and then via text messaging. Baby steps.
5. Finish A Story That I'm Proud To Share With Other People. I write A LOT. But, I rarely, if ever, share anything I write with anyone else. I want to use my creative energies to write something I'm very proud of, and not afraid to share. How am I going to make a living off of writing if I'm so afraid of being rejected? Which brings me to my next resolution...
6. Stop Being Afraid Of Rejection. Because, really... does it matter? What doesn't kill you, only makes you stronger.
7. Take Further Steps At Living A Greener Life Style. It's not always easy to "live" green when you are poor. Sometimes, you just have to take what you can get. But, I am going to make a conscience effort to do even better.
8. Get Organized. I am a scatter brain, and you can see it in my bedroom more than anywhere else. Time to train myself. I know it will reduce my stress levels ten fold if I can get this one under control.
9. Breathe. I do not do this enough. Anyone that is close to me know that I'm usually having a panic attack, pretending I'm not having a panic attack, or distracting you from the fact that I'm panicking by making jokes. I'd like to just breathe and avoid the panicking all together.
10. Be Happy And Take One Day At A Time. I know my emo-nature can be charming sometimes, but I'd like to boot that depressive little part of me for good this year. (I do write better when I'm sad... But, then again... maybe my writing is so sad and that's why I never want to share it with anyone. And, until I conquer this, how can I conquer Resolution Number 5? The circle of life my friends.) There is so much beauty and happiness in this world. I have to stop letting the dark overtake the light.
2012 is going to be a CRAZY year! We are having another BABY for crying out loud! Eva has been the only one for 4 years... and in July, she will have a little brother or sister to show the ways of the world too... Life is definitely changing!
She's gonna be a great big sister. I hope you're feeling better!!
ReplyDeleteWOW!!! Another baby!!! Congratulations, A. I'm so happy for you. Nothing like a new little addition to the family to brighten up the new year.
ReplyDeletePost pictures of the little one when it's born. :-)
Congrats on the baby!! And I hate hate hate hate throwing up, so I'm SOOOOOOOOO sorry you were sick :(
ReplyDeleteFlu definitely is awful. I had food poisoning once and the stomach flu once while I was preggo (in the third trimester) with Jacob. It was AWFUL and I'm so glad that you're feeling better (and blogging because I like to read your stuff!). I love your resolutions and look forward to hear how they're coming along! Yay for a new year!
ReplyDeleteI like when you say "fuck."
ReplyDeleteMAN! I hate the 'just keep swallowing juuuust keep swallowing ok ok no puke? wait.. uh oh.. puke..' moments from pregancy. I love the 'make more time for art'. It feels so good to express in a fluid, physical way. Oh and living a green lifestyle.. i totally want to post some stuff about that! i do it as dirt cheap as i can. oh blogging.. so fun!
ReplyDelete